victoriaxxx

Welcome ! Yes we all do accept it differently. Some people take more time than others.. Some people don't take that much time at all. For me it was about a week and a half when I accepted the truth, and came to accept myself. (:

Welcome to the forum ! First off, you didn't know that you could pass it on like this. You were uneducated about it. There are many doctors out there that don't tell people the information that they need to know. That this can be transmitted orally and genitally. It is not yourself. You need to understand in yourself and your own mind that this is not your fault. I know it is hard, and it is normal to feel this way. It is definitely the stigma talking and its all in your head. As for him, give him some space, but let him know that you are here if he needs you. He has to accept this on his own and come to terms with this on his own. He might be upset but hopefully he can feel better in time. Time heals all wounds. (:

Google was indeed the worst desicion of my life !

First off I wanted to say... I need sex ! My boyfriend needs sex ! I am a crazy without sex. Do you know how much tension and stress sex relieves ? Anywho.. You have a serious condition that can become cancerous.. He has herpes. Even if you did contract Herpes it will not become cancerous, and it is not that harmful.. I mean you want to be careful engaging in sex with open sores of course.. Also there are many ways to try to get around getting herpes. (: Condoms, him on supressive therapy. Read the hand outs, they have great information about the condition.. All in all it is all up to you, if you really really like him and you want to take the chance then do it. (:

Online dating is a scary thought for me.. How do yall do it ?

Dancer is right. Counseling would probably be the best way to learn how to cope with this. To cope with how to talk about this. You have to understand that its not all easy. We all go through those feelings. We all think about ourselves at points.. But you realize this and you care about how he feels. That is a really good sign.

My mom did take supressive therapy at the end... But since she was so ill that did not help her... But I doubt you will go through the same thing, my mom ended up having cancer of the uterus... Didn't find out until she was about to birth me.

Thats why the chimpanzee that determines the superbowl winner and has picked correctly every year so far chose the Seahawks to win ! Uhhh I am not really stressing. I have faith in my team... I know they are going to pick apart the broncos. (: It's okay ! Hahahaha Maybe you should keep some valtrex on you also. I think you might be breaking a sweat over there watching your dear Broncos !

In the end we all only have power over ourselves.

I agree.. You could be stressing to much about this talk. I know that its hard to come out and say it, but stay calm. Remember that your attitude will reflect their attitude.

Hehehehe. Herry !

That was great Dancer.. I don't try to put conditions on my friendship. I just try to help them. You know ?

Oh.. They said they give the pamphlet to everyone who contracts it.. It was an A-Z all about herpes !

Good for you !

You are on the right track ! I just wanted to say that. Yes it hurts. Yes sometimes I break down. My mother who has had it for over 25 years still breaks down now from time to time.. It's the stigma we have to get over. && even if you guys don't get back together there is someone out there who would love to be with you and help you along with your achievements. Who would love to back you up. I love hearing other peoples stories, because I am so glad that you are still working towards your goals. I feel as if that is a good start. It will help the healing process, because you are worth so much more !

Yeah even though I am on my valtrex I get pimples.. I guess that is how I know the difference.. My little pimples don't go away for like a week or two weeks. I just keep cleaning them.. When I feel my little herpes friend I take an extra valtrex and then it doesn't show up ! Yay. I do love my vitamin C !

Yeah my first OB was actually better than my second. I only get like one bump now in the same spot, but the pimples just show up in random area's. I guess your best bet is to go get it checked out.

I was worried about the same thing. I generally was myself down there every day.. Sometimes I get pimples down there quite often. Actually to be honest I have one right now. Generally I know the difference now between a pimple and an outbreak. They look different. The pimple doesn't look like an open ulcer.

Aha OPM ! I love that. (:

I just wanted to say that I do understand where you are coming from on this subject. It's not that I resent them for not having this, but I share with some of them. Try to tell them how easy it is to get an STD, yet they keep on having sex without condoms or precautions in general. One girl " Well he told me he was clean.." Well now that I have had this happen to me, I am not mad about it. I want to see their papers. I want to know the truth, because a lot of people lie. It seems like a lot of my friends don't get that. I try to tell them that it can happen at any point. Some of their answers are " Well I don't sleep with nasty people." Well thanks. I didn't sleep with nasty people either. It just happened. It is that easy. It is just as easy for Chlamydea or any other STD for that matter. && once you have it you look back and say " Wow I should have been more careful." Being careful is one thing, but I also realize I have a lot of friends who don't get tested at all... because they have " not seen or felt anything the matter with them." I said there can be so many things inside your body that you don't even know about. Yet most of them still disregard their health. I don't have a resentment towards them though, because this is a part of life. It happens differently to other people. Some people get cancer, some people asthma, and some of them herpes or other things. It's not fair to resent them.

ME too ! Keep me tuned also !

My mother had to have a C-section due to her outbreak at the time of having me. The only reason she had to have a c-section was because she was ill with a temp of 103 and it caused an outbreak. So she couldn't have delivered vaginally. She that if she could she would have, because they were honest with her and told her that she could have a normal birth. Go get tested and find out. Tell us about it and we will be as much of a support as possible. This won't effect your kids. I was born H-. (( I got HSV-2 a little while ago.)) Also I have a friend who is pregnant she has it also. She has never had an OB but they are still putting her on the meds at the end of the pregnancy so she can deliver normal. (: It will be okay !

Herry I love the way you come across. Sometimes it is not what we want to hear , but it needs to be here. It's like me. I come off as blunt and to the point. Sometimes people take this as me being rude, but its me showing that I love and that I care! I understand Herry we can all have a bit of a chip on our shoulders from time to time.. isn't that what we are all here for ? Through the good and the bad ?

I don't think people were being insensitive. I think that it triggered some pain, because some of us got it because of a partner not disclosing with us.. It probably triggered a bit of harshness, but all in all we are a family and we are here for each other and always will be.

Thanks Herry. I am really glad to have met you on here. Your way with words always seems to get me laughing. && yes I agree, i found out what I could have done to this fellow that I found out gave it to me. Then after I thought about it for a while I thought why would I do that.. No matter what it is not going to change the fact that I have this and he has this also. We are just human. He in the end apollogized for not telling me. I actually accepted his apology.